Post the ugliest keyboards you've seen!

Findecanor

14 Jul 2018, 23:47

(I should calm down)

Red_October

15 Jul 2018, 20:05

depletedvespene wrote:
Red_October wrote:
depletedvespene wrote: (don't get me started on the ash tray — I still get mad at the memories of that)
???
Fine, I can't hold it anymore. :?

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back when I was in high school, computers weren't ubiquitous. PCs were VERY seldomly seen outside large businesses, and only a few schools sported expensive "computer labs" composed of a few (at most eight) Atari XL computers (BTW, for some reason, "English" schools had Apple II computers instead). When I was a senior in my high school and generally acknowledged as "being good with computers", I was drafted into a stupid program where we'd go to a certain other school to make classes to the alumni there — three guesses as to what was I supposed to teach.

This particular establishment was a small middle/high school for "problem" kids that had been expelled from all other places in the area — it was as low as you could get before being sent to my country's version of a halfway house; it was even limited to eight kids per class. And, for some reason, they had decided to get a "computer lab" with four Atari 800XL computers (heck, WE were a much bigger school and had only SIX 600XL, not 800XL, units).

The day came. I went there, expecting the eight kids in 9th grade to set themselves up in pairs in front of each of the four computers. The six kids that actually showed up set themselves, instead, in groups of three before two of the computers. "Oh, two don't work anymore!" "Why not?" "The seniors smoke in class and use the cartridge slots as ash trays."

I couldn't believe it. I flipped one of the computers around, opened the slot... and ash (plus other crap) indeed fell to the table. The class went downhill from there (I made the mistake of assuming these idiots would want to learn something instead of simply playing a couple games). I later told the teacher in charge of the program I would not be going there again. That was 30 years ago, and that image of the ash falling down still upsets me. :cry:
OK wow, that's quite something. I once had a horrible room-mate who put his cigarette ends in the dishwasher -which had an ashtray on top of it, because I have ashtrays everywhere you might want to smoke. I feel for ya, man, I feel for ya.

Lanrefni

17 Jul 2018, 17:09

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Currently on Amazon and making me rethink having those same keycaps on my RC128.....

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ThePewster

19 Jul 2018, 23:36

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SwissArmyTin

21 Jul 2018, 01:34

Burn it. Burn it for humanity's sake.

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whocares

21 Jul 2018, 15:47

One thing that baffles me about that keyboard is them putting a right emoji modifier on it as well. (I guess you can't type them fast enough without that important key)

Findecanor

21 Jul 2018, 16:28

SwissArmyTin wrote:
Burn it. Burn it for humanity's sake.
Agreed.

Hmm. I find no anti-Unicode emoji filter plugin for Chrome.
Maybe I should write a plugin that converts the tiny illegible Unicode emojis into proper ascii art.

davkol

21 Jul 2018, 23:25

I'm sure plenty of people would consider my Phantom quite ugly. Good thing my thumbs don't care about ugly.

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depletedvespene

22 Jul 2018, 01:38

Ugly? No. Degenerate? Yes.

(a single flipped space bar is already bad enough, kiddo)

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Phenix
-p

22 Jul 2018, 22:00

davkol wrote:I'm sure plenty of people would consider my Phantom quite ugly. Good thing my thumbs don't care about ugly.

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That’s a Phantom 7BIT Layout.
Im using ergodox daily but if someone wants to sell this „odd“ board in that Layout pm me

Red_October

23 Jul 2018, 02:25

davkol wrote: I'm sure plenty of people would consider my Phantom quite ugly. Good thing my thumbs don't care about ugly.

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How do you even type with no spacebar???

davkol

23 Jul 2018, 07:40

Magic…

Seriously though, the bottom row is essentially the same as on a JIS keyboard, except the extra modifiers are remapped to AltGraph and Fn.

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Muirium
µ

23 Jul 2018, 10:13

Looks like you’ve more keys down there than sense! I get a few extra mods, but what are you doing compared with JIS?

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Even with a cute little Japanese spacebar, you’d have the extra keys for the mods you describe, by swapping them in for the Japanese language keys muhenkan, henkan, and kana. And, come on, cute little Japanese spacebar! Your keys are grouped, which is nice, but I do wonder which one does what.

As for aesthetics: I can forgive your flipped mods / ersatz spacebars. Thumbs want something different. My visual concern is with that rogue right Shift failing to match the left! Two similarly unmatched Tabs are no excuse…

davkol

23 Jul 2018, 13:57

The spacebar row is the same as Realforce 91U, except with spacebar split into two keys (1.5u + 1u). Modifiers on mine are Ctrl-Super-Alt-AltGr (mirrored on the right-hand side), the middle two 1.5u keys are Fn and spacebar respectively, and I don't really use the remaining 1u key.

The "flipped" keycaps are in the old extra steep Cherry profile; I hold them with a thumb rather than tap.

I wish the rest of the keyboard was closer to JIS, especially the right Shift, which would enable a two-column wide mod. Not so sure about the Enter key, though. This way I can have an "unix-like" Backspace (certain Sun Type keyboards, HHKB) and the 1.25u Enter doesn't bother me too much; perhaps I could use one thumb key as Enter instead. Not sure about the left Shift either: the extra key turns out to be useful (I use it to type brackets straight on the home row and it's easy to chord it with Shift).

It's hard to find caps in a consistent profile, though, more so if you're as cheap as I am.

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Blaise170
ALPS キーボード

23 Jul 2018, 15:05

So it looks like the so called "smoker" keyboard is at least from 2001 or earlier, if Google is to be believed.

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digital_matthew

23 Jul 2018, 18:48

Blaise170 wrote: So it looks like the so called "smoker" keyboard is at least from 2001 or earlier, if Google is to be believed.

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It's probably still in use, with seventeen years of nicotine and burns built up on its already suffering frame.

Red_October

24 Jul 2018, 19:34

digital_matthew wrote:
Blaise170 wrote: So it looks like the so called "smoker" keyboard is at least from 2001 or earlier, if Google is to be believed.

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It's probably still in use, with seventeen years of nicotine and burns built up on its already suffering frame.
I saw one like it in person, cleaning out an incredibly filthy apartment with my Ex. Computer chair was in the middle of a 6' diameter circle of ends to the point of looking like a carpet. Keyboard was indescribable. This was a 3rd-floor walk-up with a ludicrous staircase, and somehow, I have no idea, someone had gotten an organ into this place. Also the fridge was apparently a nightmare, the Ex opened it, and told me not to. Well, she had been a CNA working in old people homes doing what she described as "wiping ass". She's worked with the elderly, the mentally defective, the crippled; had shit literally thrown at her head, etc. So if she told me it was that disgusting, I believed her. Fortunately all we had to do was box up some books and mail them, not truly empty the place. I'm a slob, but I have no idea how these people were living like that.

rich1051414

25 Jul 2018, 13:58

This keyboard...
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andrewjoy

25 Jul 2018, 14:51

Looks like it has a removable num pad.

Only thing going for it.

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vometia
irritant

25 Jul 2018, 22:27

andrewjoy wrote: Looks like it has a removable num pad.

Only thing going for it.
Reminds me of a Microsoft keyboard I had a few years back before I decided to do it properly and get a Model M. That thing was really absolutely dire; it did have a removable keypad that could plug in to either side (or just be left detached altogether) which was nice but everything else was an exercise in how not to do it. I think it's the only keyboard whose tacky key coatings started to disintegrate after a few weeks and which didn't even have basic things like being able to adjust the angle: it sat flat on the desk and that was that, using some unconvincing excuse about "ergonomics".

That Levetron's looks, though... well it's quite special.

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depletedvespene

26 Jul 2018, 00:26

rich1051414 wrote: This keyboard...
81p1o-fGJ5L._SL1500_.jpg
So overcharged... so over the top. It's kinda what the Humans living inside the universe of the WarCraft movie would have on their desks.

(as a compact keyboard, of course)

davkol

31 Jul 2018, 21:19

Reddit keeps on giving…

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WTF is this nasty strawberry vomit… thing?

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depletedvespene

31 Jul 2018, 21:27

Hideous — not only it's a stickbombered blue/rasp-berry vomit thing... the scooped keys are in G and K instead of F and J! :shock:

Tagotis, save us from this!

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Sangdrax

01 Aug 2018, 01:56

rich1051414 wrote: This keyboard...
81p1o-fGJ5L._SL1500_.jpg
I actually would find this thing very pleasing with different switches and caps. It would make me feel like a Mechwarrior.

Red_October

02 Aug 2018, 03:47

Sangdrax wrote:
rich1051414 wrote: This keyboard...
81p1o-fGJ5L._SL1500_.jpg
I actually would find this thing very pleasing with different switches and caps. It would make me feel like a Mechwarrior.
Nah, for this you need the Sony Dual Analog Joystick (not the little pre-DualShock pad thing, the big bastard with the two analog flight-stick style ones). Good luck finding the adapter for PC that actually recognizes its (unique) analog protocol, however! Or a Steel Battalion controller, but, again, good luck laying hands on one of those!

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chuckdee

02 Aug 2018, 04:06

701c wrote: Look what massdrop did

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It's supposed to be a nod to the Hermes. It's pretty standard 60% layout. The IC was even posted here:

keyboards-f2/hermes-rocketeer-sa-keyset ... 14483.html

I think he just decided to go with a more stylized case. I like it. Just not getting it because there are too many keyboard things coming out that I want (GMK Space Cadet for one is Friday).

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Elrick

02 Aug 2018, 11:57

chuckdee wrote:
701c wrote: I think he just decided to go with a more stylized case. I like it. Just not getting it because there are too many keyboard things coming out that I want (GMK Space Cadet for one is Friday).
Had to purchase it for my youngest who pleaded for the longest time and is now mowing the Lawn, for the rest of this year.

Hope it is worth it because we have yet to see what has been installed (stabilizer wise) when it arrives.

As an all inclusive Signature Plastic SA Key-cap set and hardware already installed it isn't a bad price considering other 60+ percenters selling at around $600USD as a kit only https://zealpc.net/collections/group-bu ... cts/zephyr.

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chuckdee

02 Aug 2018, 15:57

Elrick wrote: As an all inclusive Signature Plastic SA Key-cap set and hardware already installed it isn't a bad price considering other 60+ percenters selling at around $600USD as a kit only https://zealpc.net/collections/group-bu ... cts/zephyr.
I agree- it's a great price. I'd probably have a harder time resisting if the front side was higher. And that Zephyr has the Zeal tax added. You know... similar to the Apple tax LOL

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Elrick

04 Aug 2018, 06:14

chuckdee wrote: And that Zephyr has the Zeal tax added. You know... similar to the Apple tax LOL
For that Zephyr price tag, I could get LZ to build a complete keyboard for me from scratch.

Not saying the Zeal keyboard is garbage because it has high quality components added to it BUT their price for only a Kit, helps to avert the spend when comparing other keyboards (already built and working) ;) .

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chuckdee

04 Aug 2018, 16:59

I don't mind the kit perspective... I just don't see what it could have to justify over a 200% increase over skullY's clueboards.

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